I (officially) became a Christian in 1986 but could be earlier since I knew Jesus and started praying to Him when I was a kid. I went to a Christian kindergarten; and then a Catholic elementary school. They practised rituals like praying the Rosary and the Lord's Prayer. I thought that I was a Catholic at that time. Then I switched to a Christian elementary school. They didn't acknowledge Mary as saint as the Catholic did. I thought it's reasonable, so I switched, and thought myself as a Christian.
Then I entered a Buddhist high school. I left God soon after. But life was not as smooth as I expected, and I became unhappy and started searching for the meaning of life. There was a Christian sitting next to me happy all the time, I was amazed and curious, so I started asking her a lot of questions. She invited me, even registered for me, to go to Sunday school. Out of politeness, I did go. The class was taught by the pastor's wife. I went with an indifferent heart thinking I already heard most of the stories. Nothing interesting after several classes, strangely still I kept going for some reason.
Until one Sunday the Holy Spirit enlightened me when I was listening but not paying attention to her. The truth suddenly made sense to me. I started to pay more attention in class thereafter. Yet it's merely head knowledge for me. I wanted more in my heart which was something I was lacking - the joy and peace that my classmate possessed.
I started going to their fellowship. There I saw the joy and peace and love so real among them. But I was like an outsider who was unable to enter into their world while watching them. There was like a thick invisible wall existing between us to separate us. I wanted to get in but I couldn't, and I kept asking them many questions about the Bible. They tried to answer me but, of course, couldn't satisfy me because some questions would never have an answer.
Lastly the leader challenged me to accept Him by faith (things can only make sense by faith), and because I was so sure there was something within them that I really wanted, I finally surrendered myself to accept Jesus Christ into my life in 1986.
After Accepting Jesus Christ
I found joy and peace after I received Jesus, but one day I told God that I didn't need His love. It was because I was a middle child, I often felt ignored and unloved. I just did it naturally as a defense mechanism - don't accept it lest I'm hurt. I was walking with God though - went to fellowship, Sunday service, weekly bible study with a group of Christian classmates.
And I refused to practise idol/ancestor worship, which was very common in Chinese culture. That, of course, didn't please many elder members of my Dad's side family. I soon got persecuted by my Dad, someone I respected most. He persecuted me not because he believed in those rituals but because it was very disrespectful for me not to pay respect to our dead ancestors by not following the tradition.
He was an atheist and he kept challenging me the reasonableness of the Bible. He could ask me tons of questions that I was unable to answer, and he wouldn't let me go to bed until I gave him an answer. I tried my best in return of more unanswerable questions. I often felt exhausted and collapsed into crying and finally praying with him.
My faith was shaken by him but I refused to let go of Jesus. Every time my Dad challenged me, I held Jesus tighter. I am determined not to leave Him again like when I was young. I had His peace and I would not let it go. Soon my Dad (it was the Devil) left me alone after failing to make me leave Jesus. My faith was deeply rooted due to this incident.
I would also sense the Holy Spirit touch me to do good deeds at home such as washing the dishes. When my brother and sister saw me doing that, they would respond positively in doing the same thing too. The Lord was actually doing His work in their hearts separately through their peers, and, I supposed, while watching me being persecuted by Dad and still standing firm with my faith.
Soon my brother and sister turned to Christ too. My sister committed herself to Jesus in one evangelical meeting. I was also touched by Him in this meeting. Through the speaker (Rev. Stephen Tong), the Lord told me how much He loved me.
Loudly, the phrase, "God loves you very much, God loves you very much..." kept repeating. It was so forceful and powerful that I finally completely melted before the Lord. I burst into tears. My eyes turned all red. Even my body was twitched by His loud shouting - into my heart and my mind - until I could not refuse His love to me no more.
I sobbed terribly when I saw my sister walking out to the altar to accept Jesus. I never thought that He would care so much about my resistance to His love. But He made it clear to me that it was a big deal to Him. And He demanded me to accept His love. This is how I was bonded to Him with the seal of His love in my early walk with Jesus.
On 25 December 1987, one year after I received Jesus, all three of us - my brother, my sister and me, were baptized together by the same pastor that we loved and respected much. Dad, now saw we were all baptized, thought that it was not a mistake; there must be something about Christianity. Besides, he saw my changes in his own eyes - I became more cheerful.
Hence, he started to search for the Christian faith. Meanwhile the Holy Spirit touched me and my sister to pray for his salvation, and we prayed for him regularly for two months. Later miracles happened!
My Dad was touched by the Holy Spirit as He read John 17. He was touched by Jesus' love that he wept as he read. And he wrote me a letter (he worked overseas) to let me know. It was inconceivable as I read his letter. I was wondered by His work. It was the first time reveal to me that how He could touch someone's heart. I learnt that nothing was impossible for Him and He alone was capable. My Dad finally received Jesus in a Sunday service two years after I received Jesus Christ.
I can tell you more about my walk with Him, but it is my early faith journey that set the milestone in my spiritual life that determined the destiny of my future - it sowed a seed of the desire to enter a seminary and to be a Christian worker.
To understand a guy (not just an ordinary guy but a guy in ministry) how he pick his spouse, I've asked a brother who's a Christian worker in India, his answer to me is for WORK! Currently I have another conversation with another worker in HK, his most concern when choosing a spouse is if she would fit into his ministry and his lifestyle, such as live by faith, willing to move around the globe whenever being led by God... I don't have a problem with it, but do we as female really need to fit ourselves into our partner's life? Can this be vice versa?The two significant figures representing these two extremes appear in my mind are Ruth of Billy Graham and Joyce Meyer - one behind the scene, one up front on the stage.
To continue on the book "How To Build Great Relationships" by Brian Houston, the section of The Power of Marriage...
'BUT WHOEVER DESIRES TO BE BECOME GREAT AMONG YOU, LET HIM BE A SERVANT' [MATTHEW 20:26]
When my wife and I married, we had both lived in a relatively small world in New Zealand. Over the years I have enjoyed seeing her life grow and expand. Today she has increased in confidence and her gifts and talents have flourished. She has written books and speaks all over the world.
Sadly, there are those who keep their partner suppressed and shackled. Some even use scriptures out of context to control their spouse and keep their world small. Because of this insecurity, their home is full of resentment, hurt and negativity. The truth is that by holding your partner back, you also hold your own life back.
Learn to invest into your partner. Empowering them to become a bigger person will lead to greater horizons for you both. Most Christians recognise Proverb 31 as depicting the awesome qualities of a Godly woman, but I think you also gain valuable insight into her marriage.
'She makes tapestry for herself; Her clothing is fine linen and purple. Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land.' [Proverbs 31:22,23]
This verse describes a man who is a well-known and influential leader whose wife is obviously able to dress in fine garments. But here is another way of looking at it - perhaps his commitment to dressing his wife in fine linen contributed towards his success.
I'm not talking about the expense of clothes or what people wear, but an attitude that loves blessing and empowering the people around you. If you can see beyond yourself and be committed to seeing your partner flourish, it can open you up to a much bigger, expansive life and build a wonderful marriage.
Can the two totally different persons be together? What really makes marriage work? This is my question and many's question...
To continue on the book "How To Build Great Relationships" by Brian Houston, the section of The Power of Marriage...
'BLESSED ARE THOSE WHOSE STRENGTH IS IN YOU' [PSALM 84:5]
From the moment a couple are joined together in marriage, they begin a journey of life together. Like any road travelled, there will inevitably be twists and turns to negotiate.
Every marriage has its share of tests and trials, but why do some emerge stronger, while others fall apart? I can testify to three key secrets that will help to build a strong marriage.
Two people who love God
Two people who love God and put Him first in their lives have the ingredient for a strong marriage. When one partner is passionate about God and His purpose but the other isn't, it makes the journey together a lot more difficult.
'Blessed is the man whose strength is in You.' [Psalm 84:5]
When the strength of your marriage is your commitment to Him, you can go through challenges and emerge stronger.
Two people who love the House of God
The Bible is clear that one of the keys to a blessed life is our association with God's House (His Church). It says:
'Those who are planted in God's House shall flourish' [Psalm 92:13]
'Blessed are those who dwell in Your House' [Psalm 84:4]
My personal experience is that the love my wife and I share for the Church has been a unifying factor in our marriage and the strength of our family.
Two people who love each other
It may seem obvious, but the third secret of a blessed marriage is a union of two people who love each other. This is the love that Paul wrote about in 1 Corinthians 13 - it suffers long, it is kind, and it does not envy or parade itself. This love doesn't seek its own, is not provoked and thinks no evil. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things and endures all things. This is a love that will 'never fail.'
So I think as long as we have these three secrets, the two may be totally different persons can be married and be merry ever after.
In between Yom Teruah (28 September sunset) and Yom Kippur (8 October sunset) is the Ten Days of Awe for self assessment and accountability before God for choices made in the previous year... Talking about making right choices, I think nothing is more important than choosing the Right One. Therefore, even it's 2:30 am and I need to sleep and pack for tomorrow trip, I want: To continue on the book "How To Build Great Relationships" by Brian Houston, the section of The Power of Marriage...
MAKING RIGHT CHOICES - 'DO NOT BE UNEQUALLY YOKED TO UNBELIEVERS' [2 CORINTHIANS 6:14]
Choosing your marriage partner is one of the most important decisions you will ever make. Marriage is intended to be the greatest partnership in life, but when built on a poor foundation, it is doomed to struggle or fail.
There are several reasons why people choose the wrong partner - it can be a strong physical attraction, becoming involved on the rebound, or wanting to avoid being single at any cost. Ultimately, they ignore wise counsel and the warning signals. You can avoid making a serious mistake by considering these key warning signs.
Watch out for spiritual compatibility - The Bible is clear that we should not be unequally yoked. When two lives are pulling in different directions, something has to give. There will obviously be a potential source of disagreement and such conflict won't help build a harmonious marriage. Sharing the same values, morals, ethics and spiritual beliefs is vital for a blessed partnership.
Be careful when there is emotional dysfunction - Don't ignore the signs of someone who has a pattern of extreme behaviour. Severe depression, hypersensitivity or problems such as bulimia are not suddenly going to disappear after you get married. We all have issues in life which need to be overcome but mistakes can be made because of what we ignore. For example, a cute smile will not mask an ugly temper. A marriage can be destroyed by emotional problems that haven't been dealt with.
Sexual perversion or confusion - Sex was created to bless a deeply intimate relationship between husband and wife, but outside God's parameters, it will only bring hurt and pain. Even when a person has turned away from their past experiences, it takes time to renew their thinking, and change old behaviour patterns to line up with the Word.
Both partners will reap what is sown into a marriage, so use Godly wisdom when it comes to a life-long partnership.
I have been thinking of : To continue on the book "How To Build Great Relationships" by Brian Houston, the section of The Power of Marriage, but don't know how to begin with (as I found his first paragraph is kind of personal), today I've found the suitable moment, and I want to begin with this song that I just heard from a wedding this afternoon. This song is called Together, which clearly lays out God's idea of marriage...
TOGETHER Before the world began, our union was His Plan, our lonely days are gone, Together we'll be one; wherever you may go, wherever you lodge, Whatever you will do, I will be with you. * And we'll go on together, walk together, bound by a love from God in heaven above; Now we will stay together, pray together, yielding our lives into His hands of love. * Within our home this day, Our God we will obey, And He will lead us from, The troubled times that come, and with your hand in mine, We'll stand the test of time, and through the darkest night, The Lord will be our light
TOGETHER - 'AND THEY SHALL BECOME ONE' [GENESIS 2:24]
'He who finds a wife finds a good thing.' [Proverbs 18:22]
Marriage is God's idea and He purposed it for good. It is the most intimate relationship you will have with another person because it is a powerful spiritual and physical union where two become one.
'A man shall leave his mother and father, and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one.' [Genesis 2:24]
Being joined together describes being attached and connected. It literally means to stick like glue. Try to pull it apart and both parties will experience a lot of hurt and pain.
At the culmination of the marriage vows, the minister usually declares the words of Jesus over a couple:
'Therefore whom God has joined together, let no man separate.' [Mark 10:9]
The fact is that you never want to pull apart what God has joined together, be it a marriage, or any other God-ordained partnership. On the other hand, you don't want to attempt to put together something that God never intended. Sadly, some people try and join things together that have no future, while others try to pull something apart that is very much part of God's plan.
One of the most significant choices we can ever make relates to the choice of our life partner, so we need to understand what it truly means to be joined together.
